Oct 06

Connection- could it be this simple?

If we’re all connected, then why do we each feel all alone sometime?  How is it that we can be with someone in a relationship and yet feel all alone?  How is it that we can be in a roomful of friends and acquaintances and yet feel like no one cares?

We’ve forgotten

If we looked deep down to the depths of our being, we would find that we need to be connected to other human beings.  We don’t have a choice.  In fact, we are connected.  We’ve simply forgotten.

There are so many things going on that we can’t see.  What we see is only a tiny fraction of what there is to see.  How can that be?

cellsImagine that you’re a cell inside the stomach.  All you know is what goes on in your tiny area of the stomach.  You may know a few of the other cells right around you.  You might like some of them because they help you when there’s food being dumped on you and you have to work like crazy to digest it and move it along.  There are probably some other cells that you don’t like because they don’t carry their load of the work.  Maybe there are even others that appear to be sleeping and you can’t stand them and complain about them every chance you get.  They could have another role, like producing an enzyme, but since you don’t know that, it just pisses you off that they’re lounging around while you’re working your little finger molecules to the bone.

All in all, you might know a hundred other cells.  You like some, you don’t like some, and there are some that you hate.  But what about the trillions of cells in the other organs, the skin, the feet, the nose, and the rest of the body?  You don’t see them and you don’t hear them and you don’t know that they exist.  You have no idea that you’re all working together, unknowingly, to keep the body functioning.  You can’t even imagine it.  If one of the other cells told you about it, you would think it was crazy.  You’d probably make fun of it and ostracize it.

The cost of independence

What if each of us is like that little cell in the stomach?  What if we were all acting independently, doing our own thing?  Isn’t that exactly what we like to do?  Flaunt our individuality and do our own thing?  While every cell is busy doing its own thing; dying its hair purple, getting tattoos, piercing its tongue, the food in the stomach is sitting there rotting.  Now and then, a few cells go bad and start beating up on nearby cells.connect  A few of the bad ones start a gang and recruit other cells.  After they beat them up a few times, they’re too weak to resist and they join.  Before you know it, they’re spreading throughout the body.  This is what we know of as cancer.

Our world has cancer.  No matter where we live or what we do, we are part of this world.  We are all a vital part of this world.  Just like there’s not one tiny cell of the body that doesn’t have a function, there’s not one human being that doesn’t have a function.  We may not know what our function is, but we do have one.  Tiny babies who live for a day have a function.  Old men who live to 104 have a function.  We may never know what our function is and some of us may be lucky enough to figure it out.

You may have noticed that this world doesn’t seem to be working so well.  I’ve noticed it, which is why I avoid reading or listening to the news.  There’s a lot of hatred and violence in the world.  A simplistic explanation is that we think that we’re alone and we think that we’re right.  We think that we’re different, better than, smarter than, more right than everyone else.  But we don’t realize that we’re in the same boat.  We’re all part of the same body and we’re fighting each other.  We’re beheading them, torturing them, blowing them up, and blaming them for everything wrong with our lives.  When they’re really just like us.

How it could be

Imagine that the world is like the body.  connected4Each one of us is vital, important, perfect, whole and complete.  We each have a job to do and each job is interrelated to the next.  We love and respect each other because we are working together toward a common goal; keeping the world going.  No one is more important than another.  We depend on each other.  We are connected to each other.  We need each other.

We need each other too.  I know we’ve all been hurt in one way or another, and to protect ourselves, we’ve pulled away.  I’ve pulled away from the people that I love the most.  And I’ve made them wrong for doing what they did that “forced” me to pull away.  So I’ve been separate and safe.  And mostly I’ve been alone.

I’ve been alone and yet I’ve never been alone.  I can’t be alone, because I, like you, am a part of life on this planet.  I’m connected to every other life on this planet.  I’m just like every other person on this planet.  We may look different.  We may act different.  We may smell different.  And we’re all the same.

I love you.  It’s not easy to love you.  It’s easier to love people who agree with me and have similar values.  OK… I don’t really love all of you.  That’s a lie.  I want to be able to love all of you.  It’s really really hard when you’re being mean or cruel.  Or when you have an opposite opinion about something that’s important to me, like gay rights.  It’s hard to love you when you think it’s okay to beat up or kill people for being gay.  It’s hard to imagine that you and I are the same.

I’m convinced that the key is our connection.  We have to start connecting again.  I’m starting with my family and friends, and then I’m going to move outward.  I invite you to pick someone who you are fairly close to and deepen the connection.  Ask them to share something with you that they don’t talk about to anyone.  And share something personal with them.  Trust them.  You’ll get to know them at a new level.  You’ll start to feel connected.

It’s simple, isn’t it?  It’s not easy, but the alternative is living in a separate and hostile world.  I don’t know about you, but I’m going to give it a try.  Who wants to get connected?connected3

Please leave a comment below and let’s connect.  What are your thoughts?  Who do you want to connect with?  I look forward to hearing from you.




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  1. laura

    Hi Alice,

    What is connecting to other people, people that we choose, going to bring? More details about their lives, more confidences, more knowledge? More compassion perhaps?
    When I was in my youth I used to have a lot of friends. Close friends. Many acquaintances. Many colleagues. But connecting to 100 people, does not make me more understanding when it comes to somebody’s injustice. Or death.
    Connecting to people doesn’t connect you to the universe.

    We don’t need lots of connection. We only need an opened mind. A mind that knows deep down, that I and you are the same. That I and any other person on this world are merely but one drop of consciousness, appeared and grown in different circumstances and environment.
    I don’t need worldly details about anyone. I already know them all. I know it sounds inflated, but I swear is not. Only that I understand and respect each and every cell of the universe. From the worse serial killer to Dalai Lama.

    You should know that even if I comment here, I do like your posts. A lot. :)

    1. Alice

      Hi Laura,
      Thanks for sharing your thoughts on this subject. There’s so many different aspects to connection that we could probably write a book. I didn’t mean to imply that we need lots of connections or that we need to find out worldly details about people. We are, in fact, connected already. All we need is more knowing.

      I look forward to hearing more of your views. Please come back again. And I’m glad you like my posts.

  2. MaryAnn

    I LOVE this post! Thank you! It’s as if you peered into my mind and described my childhood perception of the microcosm and the macrocosm. We are all little cells in a much larger body, and every little speck of dust might be an entire cosmos.
    Alice, I really like the way you write: straightforward and logical but also deep and personal. So glad you’re out there.
    Keep it coming!

    1. Alice

      Thanks so much, MaryAnn. It’s important to know that people are out there reading my words. It can seem like I’m just writing to myself sometimes, so I’m glad that you appreciate it and took the time to leave me a comment.

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